A Learning Experience

The theme of this weekend: R & R. But to be honest, we have been on quite the laid back schedule since we got here. 

Brandon and I have been talking a lot lately about why God brought us to Bethel, of all places. What we had in mind when we thought of coming to Alaska was tall mountains, bears wading in streams, fishing every weekend, camping by glacier lakes, and spending most of our time with packs on our backs trekking through the woods. Bethel = 360 degrees the opposite.

It’s not that it’s a bad place to be. There is unique beauty in the vast tundra, wild berries growing everywhere, Yup’ik fish camps, and experiencing one of the last cultures in the US that still practices a 100% subsistence lifestyle.

But it is also a very poor community. Drugs, alcohol, domestic abuse, sexual abuse, and untimely deaths are a daily song in these parts. Brandon and I have patients on an almost daily basis that come in with black eyes, bruised ribs, separated joints (“my husband kicked me”), or heavy hearts from the recent loss of a young family member. Needless to say, it has been a very humbling experience. One that has made us reflect over and over on what lessons God brought us here to learn. Here is what we have come up with so far:

 Live a life of appreciation, not expectation. We came here expecting a grand adventure of hiking and camping and fishing and mountain climbing, and sunbathing by a lake. These things are our livelihood. We would never choose to live somewhere without outdoor adventures to be had. But being in Bethel has taught us that these luxuries are not a given; they are a blessing. I think somewhere between the Rockies and the warm desert sun, we started to take that fact for granted. In Bethel the most exciting outdoor activity is walking on the tundra (if you are without boat/ATV/snowmachine). But we have come to embrace that. We are blessed to have two legs, sandwiches in our packs, and each other’s company to take that walk. And you know what? It’s really all we need. (Well, mosquito repellant too….)

Make time for the ones you love. Life is tough out here. I don’t think I’ve met one native who hasn’t lost a family member to drugs/alcohol, domestic abuse, ATV accident, drowning, or freezing to death. It really put it in perspective for both of us: time with loved ones is precious. We have started doing weekly Skype/Facetime dates with our parents and making more of an effort to stay in touch with old and new friends. Sure, it has cut our TV/internet time and made our Sunday nights one giant catch-up fest,  but it has made us feel so much more fulfilled in those relationships than ever before.

Marriage is a work in progress. In Bethel, we are together 24/7. We wake up together, go to work together, go to the gym together, go home and cook dinner together, hang out with our couple friends together, and so on. While this has been an awesome change compared to living in different cities (which was more than half our relationship), it has also taught us A LOT about each other and marriage. About give and take. About working as a team. About communicating; openly, honestly, and often. About knowing when to give space, and when to stand close. About growing together. And most of all, (WARNING – cheesiness ahead) about loving someone so much that no matter how many ups/downs you go through and how much time you spend together, you still can’t get enough. Unconditional, patient, forever kind of love.

Enjoy the simple things. I know this post has been pretty heavy, so I figured we could end things on a more light-hearted note. Let’s face it – there is not a whole lot to do in Bethel. The highlights of our weekends consist of: A. 45 minute trek to the grocery store, rain or shine, to spend no less than a small fortune. B. Friday night card games. C. A gluttony of wine and carbs. D. Cleaning our bunker. Or E. More walking. But to be fair, we have a much greater appreciation for these simple life pleasures. Sure, we get bored and down on the lack of pizazz this town has. But it has definitely expanded our horizon of activities we consider fun.  These days you’ll find us shooting hoops, tending to our garden (built by Brandon from scrap pallet wood), putting puzzles together, and creating new culinary masterpieces (tortilla pizza, anyone??). Life goes on without shopping malls and movie theaters, after all.

Seeeee-saaaw!

Our garden (:

Ahhhh, the simple things.